Have you ever been avoiding someone only to bump into them in the supermarket? It’s almost as if fate has brought you together to resolve an issue, but often it’s just an embarrassed acknowledgment.
Or you have been too scared to check your balance, then all of a sudden some “surprise” bills come in and you have no idea how to deal with them? Putting things off often exacerbates things and it’s only averting a crisis or noticing that avoidance will cause huge pain that jolts us into action.
Similar to procrastination (the thief of time), which makes small issues grow to unmanageable size, adding great stress, avoiding things builds tension in our lives and gives us less room to live and breath.
It’s only when the pain of avoidance outweighs the gain of having an easy time that we take the action steps.
Now imagine a few things in your life that you maybe avoid dealing with! I imagine it’s an easy list to make for many of us: money, self-worth, confrontation, weight, emotions that we find draining like anger to name but a few.
In a way, it’s like being at a party and trying not to bump into Jo, Fred, Amy and Nigel. Before long you are so busy dodging them that there is no place for fun, or meeting the friends you really like (positive action of your own choice).
One way to make the party fun again would be to ask all the unwelcome guests (subjects) to leave, but that may require some heavy security guys ( defensiveness and aggression).
An alternative perspective would be looking at just one “NO-GO-AREA!”
Money for example.
What is it about money that is so difficult?
What is the imagined pain of looking at it?
What are the values that keep me fixed in the view “I know what is going to happen” – the self-limiting beliefs that are not serving you.
What is it that you have accepted as truth about yourself and your abilities that keep you from looking beneath the surface for an answer that will improve your situation?
Action steps, even baby steps, without attachment to success, lead us to shift stuck views of a situation.
What would be one small step you could take TODAY, right now, with regard to money?
Visioning and brainstorming allow us to explore weird, wacky, fun and ridiculous points of view.
However, this creative energy without limits of our inner critic allows us to seek “out of the box” solutions as opposed to the “off the shelf, one size fits all” ones.
What would it be like not to be wearing the “I’m useless with money!” T-shirt?
Maybe even wearing one that says “I am learning to have a clean and clear relationship with money!”. It spells out the goal and the way of being ( curious, open-minded, flexible and observant).
As a topic Money is neutral; it’s our opinions, learnt behaviors and emotional connection that cause the discomfort. By opening up to new learning, even learning from our mistakes it’s possible to make dramatic transformation of our situation.
So…. what’s the next small step?